A recent remark from my SO: "Darling, I'm off to (meeting taking almost all weekend ... but I knew in advance of course) so
....
(many fine words, and then suddenlt:)
I know you 'll do fine, still cannot let you go. Enjoy the time alone too, though I want to SEE you enjoy it and shere, you know I want to control you, and me, and ... but I can't do it all the time. It wears me down"
Indeed, her controlmania wears her down, often enough. And it's hard enough to fight that and to "let go", to "put ones life in the hands of" (and fill in how you want, you and me will say God, others will not be far off calling it love or life)
Trying too hard to "take and hold control" is NOT what makes us live. It's what makes us think we are gods, right, and what makes us try to be "perfect" -as gods should be, no?
Well, we can't. We 're not gods, certainly not the kind of gods modeled after man like the romans and the greek did.
But religion is another topic, still related close enough to life itself.
O yes, we have to play our part in life as well, we have responsability over our own happiness etc, but we don't "control" it all.
You will see that with the drinking too: you CAN do it, but don't rely on your own strength alone.
Quote from a song lyric, may have been Jef van Uytsel :
Maar denk niet: "Ik ga mijn eigen gang"
Denk niet "IK ga het verand'ren"
Want alleen ben je te klein en te bang
Je KUNT niet zonder de and'ren. |
